Letting Go: The Final Step in Self-Forgiveness

By Stanley Maake

In my last post, we explored the importance of self-forgiveness and how to break free from the guilt trap. But even after acknowledging your mistakes, shifting your mindset, and making amends, there’s one crucial step left—letting go.

Many people go through the process of self-forgiveness but still hold onto fragments of guilt. They say they’ve forgiven themselves, but deep down, they still punish themselves for the past. Why? Because letting go feels like giving up control. It feels like saying, “What I did doesn’t matter.”

But here’s the truth: Letting go is not about denying what happened—it’s about refusing to let your past control your future.

Why Is Letting Go So Hard?

Letting go means releasing the emotions tied to your mistakes—shame, regret, disappointment. It requires trusting that you deserve peace, even when your past tells you otherwise.

The hardest part? Accepting that you can’t change what happened. No amount of replaying the past will rewrite it. The only thing you can change is what happens next.

What Does the Bible Say About Self-Forgiveness?

1. God Has Already Forgiven You

One of the biggest reasons we struggle to forgive ourselves is that we feel unworthy. But if God, who is perfect, has forgiven us, who are we to hold onto guilt?

📖 "As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." — Psalm 103:12

When you repent and seek God’s grace, your sins are no longer counted against you. Holding onto guilt after being forgiven is like carrying a burden that God has already lifted.

2. Condemnation is Not from God

God convicts us so we can grow, but He does not condemn us. The enemy uses guilt and shame to keep us stuck, but God calls us into healing and renewal.

📖 "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." — Romans 8:1

If you are still condemning yourself for past mistakes, ask yourself: Am I listening to God, or am I listening to the lies of guilt?

3. Your Past Does Not Define You

In the Bible, many people had to let go of their past in order to fulfill their purpose. Paul, for example, was once Saul—a man who persecuted Christians. Yet after encountering Christ, he didn’t let his past stop him from becoming a powerful vessel for God.

📖 "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!" — Isaiah 43:18-19

God specializes in transformation. If He has a plan for you, your past is not an obstacle—it’s part of the testimony He will use to glorify His name.

Steps to Finally Let Go and Move Forward

1. Stop Seeking Punishment
• Many people hold onto guilt because they feel like they haven’t “paid enough” for their mistakes. But self-punishment doesn’t heal anything. Instead of asking “How can I suffer for this?” ask “How can I grow from this?”
2. Rewrite the Narrative
• Stop defining yourself by your past. Instead of saying, “I am someone who failed,” say, “I am someone who learned.” You are not your mistakes—you are your ability to rise above them.
3. Release Emotional Baggage
• If certain places, people, or reminders trigger guilt, take steps to release them. This might mean journaling about your emotions, talking to a trusted friend, or even seeking professional guidance.
4. Trust in New Beginnings
• Life is not meant to be lived in regret. The fact that you are still here means you have the opportunity to write a new chapter. Letting go is giving yourself permission to fully step into the next season of your life.
5. Embrace Grace
• Whether through faith, self-compassion, or the support of others, recognize that you are worthy of love and peace. You don’t have to carry this weight forever.

You Deserve to Be Free

Letting go isn’t easy, but it is necessary. It’s the final act of true self-forgiveness. You are not meant to stay trapped in the past—you are meant to grow, to heal, and to move forward with confidence.

So today, take a deep breath and say it out loud:
“I release this guilt. I choose peace. I am ready to move forward.”

Because you deserve freedom. And it starts today.

Summary

Letting go of guilt is the final and most powerful step in self-forgiveness. Many people struggle with moving on, even after acknowledging their mistakes. This post explores why we hold onto guilt, what the Bible says about self-forgiveness, and how to finally break free. If God has already forgiven you, why are you still punishing yourself? It’s time to step into healing and embrace the future with peace and purpose.